A new restaurant is due to open in Bridport called "Mingers". Proprietor A. Provocateur says "I feel the town is in need of an up market, fast food emporium, given the poor choice available to the late night forager. Inspired by living off the land foody celebrities such as Huge Furry-Whittlingstool my haute cuisine will include such carnal pleasures as the Kill n Grill. You peel your favourite piece of road kill off the tarmac or extract it from your fan belt and bring it in to be "doctored" by one of our acne ridden operatives. Such delicacies as the Badger burger or the Pheasant Plucker Wrap should float on the top of ten pints of Palmers "Golden Rain" quite nicely.
There will of course be a crèche to accommodate the no doubt, herds of single mothers, swarming round our lights. This snotties play area will consist of condemned Wendy Houses with, of course, rape alarms fitted to warn off the predatory paedos that stalk the town during the wee hours.
While you wait for the fur to be shaved off your badger, why not enjoy a cocktail. The "Storm in a C Cup" a bloody Mary milkshake, should prove popular. Any more ideas very welcome”
How about it BridportRadio readers what would you like to see on the menu?
RE: MINGERS
Can I have a chavvy on rye? Cameltoe kebab
RE: MINGERS
What about grilled seagull steak, with a free lottery ticket. That should be a good way of recycling the unwanted screeching horrors
RE: MINGERS
This Mingers idea sounds OK providing it is staffed entirely by druggies with weeping sores and the shakes (shaking limbs not milk shakes). If the main entrance was situated near the belltower of the town hall, well, … you know what I’m hinting at.
Dear Mr The Bat In the interest of politkle corektness you should not refer to these people as “”””Druggies”””” the term these days I believe is “”””Moffits”””” (from the commonly heard scag-head phrase “”””I’m off it.””””